Break Loose and Run Free
There’s a story I love.
It’s about the two sons of a patriarch, Isaac. Their names are Jacob and Esau. Twin boys. You’ve probably heard of them. No one remembers Esau as the good guy, but he’s a lot like you and me.
The boys grew up. They were really different from each other. As the firstborn, Esau was big and strong while Jacob was small and whitty. They were always competing with each other.
One day, Esau was really hungry so he traded his birthright as the oldest son for a bowl of soup that Jacob made. His younger brother outwitted him. Later, Esau also lost his blessing to his younger brother because Jacob tricked their dad.
When Esau vented about his brother's trickery to his dad, Isaac said to him: “You will live by your sword, and you will serve your brother. But when you can’t take it anymore you’ll break loose and run free.” (Genesis 27:40)
Let’s pause here to take note of something important.
Freedom is a choice. It was Esau’s choice to break free. His dad didn't say, “God will break you free.” It was going to be up to Esau to get tired enough of his oppression to BREAK FREE.
Esau found himself in a place of oppression because of his own mistakes. He traded his birthright in a moment of weakness, trading his purpose for momentary comfort, but that didn’t have to be the end. He still had the choice to BREAK FREE.
Have you ever been so hungry for comfort that you traded something really valuable to feel better for a moment? Have you ever felt trapped in a toxic relationship and wondered how you got there?
We’ve all done it. I've been around long enough to realize that each of us has found ourselves in a really vulnerable place like Esau.
We found ourselves latching on to the comfort of a connection that sucks us in, getting caught up in the excitement of a relationship full of red flags. We've agreed to something that didn't honor who we were. We've signed our names to agreements even though something in our guts told us that it wasn't right.
We've been talked into eating the soup of oppression that sits like a heavy rock in the pit of our stomachs. We've said the words that we can never take back. We've sent the emails that we wish we could unsend.
We've been willing to trade in pieces of our values and our purpose to merge with the path of someone else who’s life did not contribute to who we could become or where we want to go.
Before long, we felt the oppression start sneaking in like a poisonous gas. But we put blinders on. It happens so easily. We talk ourselves right into it.
One day we wake up and we realize that we signed our rights away for comfort and it’s become a leash on our souls… But this isn’t the end. Oppression is NEVER the end. Leashes were made to be broken.
It’s up to you.
BREAK LOOSE AND RUN FREE.
Back to our story.
What happened next? What happened to Esau after he wept bitterly with that leash of oppression around his neck? What happened after he swore that he would kill his brother after their dad died?
Well, there's good news. Esau didn't kill Jacob. The story doesn't end with murder or oppression.
We don't know the exact moment when Esau decided that he couldn't take another moment of oppression. But it's evident that he broke free.
Years and years later, the brothers saw each other again in person for the first time. With the breath caught in my throat, the scene plays out in slow motion in my mind. Jacob has sent gifts ahead of him to meet his brother as a peace offering because he is afraid that his brother is still angry with him. He comes to their meeting after spending the night wrestling with God. He's terrified that his brother is going to kill him, but the opposite happens.
When Jacob and Esau get close enough to see each other's faces on the broken ground between them, Esau breaks into a run to meet Jacob. Instead of plunging a knife into Jacob's heart, Esau grabs Jacob in a warm hug and smacks a wet kiss on his cheek. Shaking, they both weep.
Esau chose to break free because he chose to forgive his brother. Ah. Didn't see that one coming, did you?
If you have a moment, open Genesis 33 and read the whole chapter. I hope it speaks volumes to you as it did for me.
To me, this is one of the most powerful moments of reconciliation in the entire bible. It stuns me all the way to my core in the best kind of way. I'm in awe of this story, because I struggle to forgive the people that have taken advantage of me, tricked me, or broken promises. And what about forgiving myself? Forgiving myself for mistakes I’ve made is always harder than forgiving other people.
Unforgiveness, whether it’s aimed at others or ourselves, is always a prison that traps us.
